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Saturday, May 17, 2008

Are you waiting for that perfect someone or are you with someone you want to be perfect?

Governments have spent billions trying to avoid landmines. Here we are purposely stepping on them. If anything, we are here to try and help those that are coming up the path behind us.

The first word that I want to address is “perfect”. Is there such a thing? I believe in the pursuit of perfection. If you aim for the stars, you are sure to hit clouds. The problem with the “concept” of the word perfection is that it’s very perception is relevant to the one making the observation. How many of us have stood in front of a painting with a small sign beneath it declaring it a “masterpiece” while thinking that you wouldn’t hang it in your garage, yet somebody out there was willing to spend millions on it. Go figure. So is it okay to seek the perfect partner? Yes it is.

Here is the catch. Because everything can be perfect relevant to the person making the observation, the observation itself will be tempered by the condition of that persons universe at the time the observation was made, perfect perfection cannot truly exist. Can you name one thing that without exception, everyone who was exposed to it, would think that it was perfect? I did not think so. (This not being a perfect observation, somebody will think I lost my marbles.)

We are all in a state of change. Every day when you wake up, you are not the same person that went to sleep the night before. Thus the old saying, “change is the only constant”. This being the case, you can always pursue perfection tempered by the knowledge that the pursuit will never end.

We now know how to deal with our expectation of perfection. Let’s add to the flavor of the stew by slowly stirring in acceptance and gratitude to the mix. We must strive for personal control of our universes. Part of doing that entails following paths in our lives that make us the very best we can be. We do this so that we can protect and serve those that we hold near and dear to our hearts. Whatever life situation you find yourself in, including relationships, you need to ask yourself if it drives or hinders your attainment of your life goal. If you say no, then corrective measures need to be taken. But if you say yes, then you have by doing so, indicated acceptance of your situation. Once you have accepted your situation, you now “accessorize” your universe by showing gratitude for those things that you do have that further your pursuit of your life goal. When you move into a house or apartment, do you put your couch in the middle of the living room and think that you are happy with your new abode? You most likely will want to paint the walls, put up a picture, and change the shower curtains, right? You may never be able to add that second floor, but you accepted what was there, and were grateful for the protection your home provided for you.

You are thinking that is all well and good for those that are still looking. What about everybody that is already in a relationship? Well, I suggest that you read the previous post,”Is LOVE ever enough?” Well is it? Once you have answered this question and decided that the WHO is who it should be, then the steps are the same. You have made the educated decision to accept your situation. You now have to strive to make it what you want it to be first remembering that you can only change or control your own universe. The power that you do have is that through positivism and gratitude, you can affect change in those around you. Notice I said “affect” not outright change. The key is to do constant assessments of your situation and modify your decisions accordingly. When you ride a bicycle or drive a car, you will find that you make subtle adjustments as you move along to keep you on the path, right? Life is the same way.

Wait for that perfect somebody or is that somebody perfect? The pursuit of perfection is the key. Just remember that the expectation of perfection is unreasonable. Our mantra here is to be the very best you can be, not be perfect. Take care until next time.


Allen'Wifey said...

hi very nice post your blogs is very very informative.

Just walking around

see you

FANCY said...

Yes I want that MR Perfect... who can do everything that I can't do...and is boring to do on your self...and...and....and...;-)))))))

pinayLoveStories said...

Hi David T.

Yes,I read loud and clear hahhahaa i like your post because its too long and full of of good thoughts suddenly i got strike some hahaha yes...nobody is perfect. Are u a teacher? just wondering kc your posts is full of wisdom thoughts and pondering of the soul if somebody hunger for it.I love reading too.Thats my passion but writing its not my cup of tea...i just write my blogs because i want to earn extra money. hahhahaa thank you for always dropping by tomorrow i will write review about your blogs so that you can get free traffic i will put your link.

God bless

The_Sphinx's World said...

Hi David,

As always, this post makes me THINK. For me, I believe nobody is perfect. And when you truly love somebody, it goes without saying that you love his imperfections too. What you do together maybe perfect though, for the both of you, like a perfect date with a perfect dinner in a perfect place and on a perfect moment...

Doc KC said...

Wonderful article! In my opinion there is no such thing as perfection and to strive for it will probably on lead to heartache and much frustration along the way, especially in a relationship. If you truly love someone, you will love them because of their flaws and not despite them. That to me is true and unconditional love.

Here is a link to my article on the ingredients to my recipe for an emotionally healthy and happy relationship:


I do remind my readers not expect every ingredient to be present in your relationship or you will set yourself up for failure, but those important aspects that are missing, can be worked on as long as the foundation is set for success.

Dr. KC

Jackie said...

I doubt there are any perfect people out there and why would we want one ? I am sure they would be very boring.

All I like to see is that a person has compassion towards both humans and animals and I can then overlook any faults they may have.

ennah d student said...

Hi David!

For me, there's no such thing as perfect. All of us has our own imperfections. And I agree, we have to be in our best always. It's nice reading your blog. I'll visit this site more often. More power in your blog. :D


Wow, this is a powerful post and has me thinking in the best of ways. Thanks.

Bridget said...

Great post...I know I am not perfect so there is no way I can hold someone else to that standard.

Besides some of the most amazing things are found in our imperfections!

365 Fit said...

People will always have their own view of perfection and who are we to stop or judge someone else who says they have found theirs. Perfection is always and will always be in the eye of the beholder. If saying someone is perfect is what they need to do, then my guess is that they are perfect.

FANCY said...

Hope it is ok that I have put in a link from me to you on my site ;-)

Anonymous said...

Excellent post. Here's my long-held philosophy: The pursuit of the perfect is the deadly enemy of the perfectly good. This applies to projects at work and home, and to interpersonal relationships equally.